Thursday, December 3, 2009


I have been busy with sad things going on but had to come here to vent. I am so angry at people right now I just feel horrible. I have been asking family and friends to remember our babies by helping do things like our memorial walk and volunteer work making things in memory of our babies for a non-profit foundation. Some family just isn't their for us or our babies. Really, one little thing is all I ask and I can't even get that. WHAT DO WE NEED TO DO. I have never hated those people more than I do today.


Andrea said...

I'm so sorry you find yourself disappointed in those who you thought would support the memory of your angels. No one ever understands this path unless they walk it. And, I find myself tired of educating people on life after loss.

Sorry you are frusterated and know that what you are doing for your babies is a beautiful thing whether your family and friends participate or not. It's not about "them", its about your angels.

Love to you and I will be praying that you can find some peace in all of this.


nikki wood said...

I know EXACTLY how you feel. We had planned a balloon release for my daughter and no one rsvp'd :( People assume because they were babies (I've lost 2 babies in 11 months) and we didn't bring them home, that someone it isn't the same as loosing an older child. I don't invite anyone anymore, I decided the best way for us to remember our babies is to do it with just the people who were there for every moment with our babies, me, my husband, and my daughter.

I know how hard it is, and my prayers are with you!

Lea said...

It's so hard being so disappointed in people you thought would be the first to support you. I think most of us experience this... I know I do. My husband's family has absolutely no clue. No amount of talking, expressing our feelings, seems to matter.

You're right, do what feels comforting for you and the people who have been with you every step of the way... otherwise, you'll drive yourself crazy!

Franchesca Cox said...

I would be angry too, and have often found myself there. I stopped setting expectations for those people (family and some friends included) because it was devastating to find out how lonely it really is when you want them to remember and they are just not interested. It's so hard. My feelings still get crushed, but like nikki wood said, it is sometimes best to remember our her with those who were there every moment. Sending you *hugs*

ezra'smommy said...


Kristy said...

I'm so sorry your family isn't being supportive. I wish they were, and I wish they understood that your life isn't the same it was before your children died. That even though 2 of your children aren't with you, that they still have names, they are still people, they should still be honoured.

Wishing you peaceful days ahead. *hugs*

Kelly said...

I'm so grateful for your post today. Because today I am so angry with a few family members - a few self-righteous self-centered people who think they are SO tolerant of me and my "weirdness" or "anger" and all the hard to manage things about me. And I am afraid to blg about it because these little twits look at my blog to see if I'm dealing with it the way they think is appropriate. But why should I care? It's hard enough to get through each day without being mena to my kids or crying all day long. I want SO bad to blog about it, but fear the negative reprocusions! Oh well. It's a process I guess. I agree with Andrea - it's tiring educating people while we grieve. I'm soglad to have this little blog community.